My youngest turns 3 next week ....

Jed's developing into a solid lad with actual knuckles instead of dimples and the ghost of a jawline emerging through the cheek fat.  But he's still my baby.

Jed and his older brother, Ezra, are three years and two weeks apart. Thinking back now to how I treated Ezra when I was heavily pregnant, I get choked up. I was so focused on my bump and then my newborn, expecting Ezra to be a big boy - essentially to 'man up'. The realisation that he was as little as Jed is now makes me want to reach back through the years and cuddle his tiny frame.

'When you're holding a newborn, suddenly your older child looks like a giant!' says Fenella, mum of two.

But your Gulliver is still a Lilliputian and needs extra TLC as you both enter strange territory.

We're Still Learning

In theory, having another baby should be a breeze. You've been there, worn the spit-up. Things like your nose growing fatter (was that just me?) or belly button popping like a cork no longer alarm you.  But whether the gap is 9 months or 9 years, there's tons of stuff you forget. The initial 'ouch' of Jed latching on totally threw me, since I'd breastfed Ezra for 18 months. Sleep deprivation was more intense than I remembered - then again, pregnancy fatigue floored me (it's the super active toddler factor).

'I felt like I was starting from scratch,' says Sam, a mum who had a 6 year gap before her twins arrived. 'So much changes over the years in what they recommend for parents. I was really young when I had my first so I'm wiser now, but more impatient. You need a lot of patience with more kids because it's full-on.'

We're More Relaxed - and that's a Good Thing

In general, second time mums are more chilled out. Pregnant with Ezra, I studied so many manuals I could have passed a medical degree. With Jed, I no longer had the time or the inclination.

'I'm way more relaxed,' says Sinitta, who's expecting her second. 'I eat sushi. Not every day, but once in a while won't hurt!'

That laissez-faire attitude continues after baby arrives. Ideas about sterilising the world or not letting them watch telly go out the window.

'I couldn't have survived without CBeebies,' admits one mum (she preferred not to be named)!

Emma, who has a boy and a girl, recalls hours wasted pureeing spinach for her firstborn. 'I wound up with just 2 ice cube sized portions that gave him an upset tummy anyway!'

She was 'much less precious' with her second who turned out 'easy-going and more independent' while her son was quite high maintenance.

There is no Perfect Age Gap

Louise's eldest was 11 when her last child was born and while it was helpful that he could pitch in, he still got jealous.

Emma's children are just 16 months apart. 'It was like having twins.' She remembers being out with the double buggy, both kids bawling, and her mum on the phone advising her to sit on a bench and have a cry herself.

'I did think, what have I done?' But it balances out in the end.

'I think it's easier with more because they entertain each other. Now they're as thick as thieves.'

Sibling Bonding is Fun... but Hard Work

My chest swells when I see my boys playing beautifully together.

But they're also 'best of frenemies' and it takes work to cultivate that sibling bond. Involve your eldest as much as possible in the story of your child's birth.

Ezra remembers the ultrasound scan and seeing Jed 'doing karate' in my belly.

We'd also watch baby videos of Ezra to remind him that he started out that way too.

Love is the Sum

I think I worried most about how I would share my time, and more importantly my heart, with two children.

'I was convinced I couldn't possibly love another child as much," says Rachel. 'Then the baby arrived and it's like my heart doubled!'

One mum summed it up with an old saying: 'Love doesn't divide, it multiplies' and that's still some of the best advice I've heard.  It's an equation to live by.

Are you pregnant for the second time or do you have two or more kids? Share your tips and thoughts in the comments!

Uju - Founder and Babe-in-chief

http://babesabouttown.com